Friday, January 9, 2015

#92 Linda Christian

Linda Christian looked like a super-model, but actually didn’t get into that many movies – and most of those were B’s anyway. She did, though, notch an interesting combination of firsts and lasts. In particular, she was the first Bond girl and was in the last Tarzan flick.

Okay, okay, the Bond thing was a TV adaption of Casino Royale (and on some series named Climax! which I never heard of). The Tarzan thing did have Johnny Weissmuller in it though. Unfortunately, someone other than Linda played Jane.


Ms. Christian was much more famous for her off-screen exploits, especially her many affairs and her jet-setting lifestyle. All in all, she was more famous for being famous than anything else.


Embarrassing Real Name:  Blanca Welter

Unusual Real Birthplace:  Tampico, Mexico

Cheesy Pageant Titles:  Azalea Queen

Embarrassing Movies
  • Tarzan and the Mermaids
  • Passport for a Corpse
  • The Devil’s Hand *
  • Slaves of Babylon
  • Tormenta
* - author has seen

Embarrassing Taglines

  • BARBARIC RITUALS! ... SAVAGE THRILLS! ... PAGAN SPLENDORS!
  • LOVE SACRIFICE TO A HEATHEN MAN-GOD!
  • NEVER-BEFORE ... Tarzan's undersea death-battle with a giant octopus!
  • SCORES OF AQUA-CUTIES ... SLAVES TO A VILLAINOUS IDOL'S WILL!
All from Tarzan and the Mermaids, BTW


Embarrassing Characters
  • Mignonette Chappuis
  • Princess Panthea
  • Hine Moa

Shortest Marriage:  Less than a year


Unlikely Spouses & Boyfriends
  • Errol Flynn
  • Tyrone Power
  • Glenn Ford
  • Diego Rivera
  • Various playboys, millionaires, bullfighters, race car drivers, etc.

Whiffs of Scandal:  
  • Sued by a former boyfriend who wanted his $1M worth of jewels back
  • Many very public affairs
  • "Her pet Chihuahua, jealous over the missing attention he receives over the bullfighters, jumps to his death from her terrace" (Glamour Girls of the Silver Screen)

Interesting Tidbits
  • Half Dutch, half Mexican
  • Lived all over the world growing up, and as a result spoke French, German, Dutch, Spanish, English, and Italian (she called herself "sexilingual")
  • Attended medical school in then British Palestine
  • Once worked as a plastic surgeon’s assistant
  • Stage name was coined by lover Errol Flynn
  • Nickname was “The Anatomic Bomb”

Where can I learn more?


Ooh la la!


<#93           #91>

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